No M&Ms for Me Today

I was pottie-trained when I was around 2 years old, but when we moved into the house in Bountiful, something threw me off, and I started wetting my pants again. To retrain me to use the bathroom rather than wetting my pants, my Dad used M&Ms as positive reinforcement. If my Dad came home from work in the evening, and I hadn't wet my pants that day, he would give me a handful of M&Ms.

I've had symptoms of a UTI (urinary tract infection) for the last 3 days, but they were so benign at first that I didn't even really realize that they were there. Today has been quite a different matter. I started out having the urge to pee every 20 minutes or so, and as the day has gone on, the urgency became more and more frequent, and the peeing became more and more painful until finally, the urge never went away completely, and neither did the pain. I think I had a UTI once when I was a kid, but I haven't had one since then, and GOD do they HURT!
I finally went to the urgent care, where I was seen by a very kind D.O. who, in addition to giving me samples for one of the drugs I needed and a prescription for the other, told me that it amazes him that such beautiful girls are going to medical school these days. (He himself graduated from medical school in the 60's and he swears that only ugly girls went to medical school back then).
I went to Smith's to have my prescription filled, and while I was there, the urge to pee was getting stronger and stronger. I tried to explain to myself that it wasn't real--I'd only just peed maybe 30 minutes ago, but my poor urethra wasn't having it. I started looking for a bathroom, but to my horror, ever few steps I took, a little bit of pee would dribble out. I seriously thought I was going to burst right there in the grocery store. I knew if I stopped to ask someone where the bathroom was, those precious seconds would do me in. I didn't know what else to do, so I went outside and started walking towards my car. I don't know why, because there was NO WAY I could make it home before I exploded. That's when I saw the golden arches. I've never been so relieved to see a McDonalds in my life. I ran across the parking lot (still dribbling every few steps) to the McDonalds.
Have you ever had to go to the bathroom SO BAD and when you finally get into the bathroom you seriously don't know if you can even get your pants down before you go? Yeah. I'm happy to report that I did, in fact, get my pants down, but the dribbling had already done enough damage. There was no way I could go back into the store. I had to drive home and change my pants first, then go back to the store to pick up my medicine. Just in case you've forgotten what a geek I am, I have to tell you that when the pharmacist told me that the pills he was giving me (Phenazopyrid) would turn my pee orange or red, I said, "That'll be fun!"

The saddest part of all is this: My life is seriously so boring, that after I picked up my prescription and I was walking back to my car, thinking about the events of the day, I seriously thought, "Well, at least now I have something to blog about!"